Quite a surprise

[bob lico]

I reported to land sea and air medical facility to take complete medical/ drug exam for renewing my 100 ton coast guard license. They even take BMi ( body mass index) .ok so I report to nurse for drug exam and much to my surprise the young nurse hands me container and them FOLLOWS me to men's room and stands next to me as I urinate into specimen cup! Naturally I ask her if she can hold it for me (that will cost you extra) I guess she hears this often.young nurse maybe 25 or so in this just in NY the way the smart asses whom carry A specimen vial in there underwear get one over on the Feds or is this all over?

[Tony Meola]

Bob

I work in HR. We drug test all new hires. That is a new one.

[bob lico]

A superior in NYPD tells me they always have a uniform male cop beside you when you take a random alcohol/ drug test but the airline pilots O tolerance for 48 hours prior to flying really made the people giving the test really eliminate any cheating.now they take a hair sample for steroids and "legal" proscribed drugs. New 100 ton license is 5 years instead of 4 ,carry it like a passport.

[MarkS]

Bob, we're all dying here! Did you pay the extra?! :)

[bob lico]

Mark that's SOP. Here in ny .she went in the bathroom with every merchant marine captain test while I was there. The question is what if it was a female captain and and male nurse?

[captbone]

The Land, Air and Sea on 109 in North Lindenhurst is normally very lax so maybe she was giving you special treatment. ;)

My 100 ton has always been a 5 year renewal. The new passport books are different but luckily you can print out your certificate off their website. Not the same quality but better then nothing.

[Bruce]

My guess that was a tranny nurse. Did you get a wink and a nod afterwards?

[Tony Meola]

Bob

By rights it should not have been a female nurse. big no no. Lawsuit waiting to happen.

Hair sample shows drug use for up to 6 months. The most fool proof method.

[bob lico]

I through so I figured a doctor could but not a nurse.for so hospital exams they they have a doctor examine you witha nurse present like urology.

[Rawleigh]

Wait till she wants to check your prostate!!!!

[Tony Meola]

Wait till she wants to check your prostate!!!!

Bob will go back daily for that one.

[MarkS]

This reminds me of a joke but I know how religious you guys are........

[Navatech]

This reminds me of a joke but I know how religious you guys are........

Feel free to PM me the joke...

[bob lico]

No joke mark ,a long time ago I played lacrosse in high school and a free ball landed ( like a fumble in football) after the pile up I ended up with a cleat deep into my toe . Now I am in the hospital like a ward with some guy in his twenties directly across the isle.around 12 pm or so a nurse comes in the ward walks over and puts her hand under the sheet and gives this guy a hand job-------- wow I was so excited assuming I was next! Nice hospital policy . Just another set back in life.

[MarkS]

Of course Bob you told her to go wash her hands and make you a sandwich?

[bob lico]

Hah just a learning experience for a snot nose kid in a adult world for the moment quite differant then today's computer world.

[PeterPalmieri]

That reminds me Bob -

I was in High School and was dating a girl a year older then me who was out of my league beautiful and thought to be a bit wild. Before we could go on a real date (keeping it PG) I got sick and ended up in the hospital, they didn't know what was wrong with me. I needed a colonoscopy and an enema, the nurse sensing I was nervous was asking me lots of questions in a effort to calm my nerves. A little laughing gas combined with an assumed six degrees of seperation I told the nurse everything about this new girlfriend.

After pouring hot wax up my rear followed by 20' of plastic hose she went and spoke with the doctors, she came back to me and said I have good news you have salmonella, I really didn't think that was good news but I guess I wasn't going to die. Then with a smile she said I have bad news, your girlfriend, I used to babysit for her, she lives across the street.

When I went back to school she had a new boyfriend and I wouldn't look her in the eye. To add insult to injury, the night before I got sick I had started a job in a local pizza place, the Doctor reported them to the health department and found they did have bad chicken. No job, no girlfriend and I wasn't welcome in the local pizza place.

[Tony Meola]

Peter

Look on the bright side, with her being a year older, whe will not be at your high School re-union, so you will not have to explain who she is to your wife. Bad news is, at the nest rendevous, hope no one tells your wife.